Monday, January 14

SOLCHOP E-MACHINE CORNER BLITZ ON PINK BERRIES

You know what's really hard?  Heading to the frozen yogurt shop with another adult and one baby.
You know what's harder?  Heading to the frozen yogurt shop with another adult and two babies.

I feel like there's been a recent influx of frozen yogurt shops in our area; we've gone from 0 to 3 in a matter of months.  Frozen yogurt... not vegan.  And no, despite the fact that it contains the word "yogurt," it's so not healthy.  But ehrmahgersh is it  DELICIOUS.

The options in Portage are as follows:

a) Yogo Delites: an unusual little joint reminiscent of a Chinese disco/nail salon hybrid; boasts bright colors, horrifically uncomfortable plastic balls that serve as chairs, and neon lights ev-er-y-where. I think "startling" is the only word that comes to mind.
b) Y'opa: a tranquil little shop reminiscent of a spa; boasts a cool blue and white palette, complete with ripple-textured walls (like you're wrapped up in soft-serve gloriousness), with real chairs that have backs and are not spheres.  "Serene" is the only word that comes to mind.

Serene.  Ha.  Enter the aforementioned 2 adults and 2 babies.

This is a scenario where it's absolutely paramount that a game plan be drawn up ahead of time.  Logistics are everything.  Gone are the days where I can just stroll into a public place and set up shop wherever I want.  No no no, plans must be made for things like Y'opa.  We're talking FROZEN YOGURT here, folks.

Some people will do anything for love.  Some people will do anything for money.  As it turns out, I will do anything for classic tart frozen yogurt. 

Our plan, below:

Disclaimer: I have no idea what a corner blitz actually is.  This looks about right.
Human A sits at the table with Mini-human A and Mini-human B, wielding sippy cups and feeding Puffs to Mini-humans while Human B carefully selects the best blend of yogurts and toppings.  Human B pays, returns to table.  Human B sits at the table with Miini-human A and Mini-human B, feeding Puffs and classic tart yogurt to Mini-humans while Human A carefully selects the best blend of yogurts and toppings.  Human A pays, returns to table.  Lather, rinse, repeat.

We went through that cycle 3 times. But it was a success.  Our bellies were sufficiently stuffed with frozen sugar, Fruity Pebbles, and Nutella (it's safe to say that any healthy options went right out the window), babies were covered in Puffs and solidified yogurt cultures, and the table was a war zone, but it was a success.

Ah, sweet, sweet success.






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