Friday, August 17

All That Glitters is Not Rose Gold

"All that glisters is not gold;
Often have you heard that told:
Many a man his life hath sold
But my outside to behold"
The Merchant of Venice, William Shakespeare

Believe it or not, my life isn't all that glamorous.  But I had you fooled for a second, didn't I?  [enter ridiculously sarcastic laughter here] 

No, I'm constantly looking at the world around me and wishing I had something else.  And that jealousy?  It comes in every lovely shade of green known to mankind.  I get jealous a lot.

I'm stricken with a tiny twinge of envy every time I see the following:
  • A house for sale
  • A pregnant woman wearing a wedding ring
  • Someone driving an Escalade (I bet you never saw that coming)
  • Someone eating Taco Bell (ohhhhh yeah)
  • A young family out to dinner
  • A couple - any couple - holding hands
  • A father - any father - holding his daughter
  • Someone posting pictures on FB of some fabulous vacation [Barcelona, Michelle? Really??  :) ]
  • Someone using a Macbook
  • The Olympics (if you can actually feel good about yourself while watching the Olympics, good for you.  For me, it was like a 2-week reality check that did nothing for my own self-esteem...)
  • My neighbor, who walks his Harper-lookalike dog.  Every.  Single.  Night.
  • My other neighbor, who goes for a walk with his wife and one-year-old son.  Every.  Single.  Night.
  • Approximately 99% of the pins on Pinterest
  • A train station (I adore traveling by train)
  • Someone wearing a rose gold Michael Kors watch
Yep, I'm a jealous gal.  I get jealous.  Jealous of both material and non-material things.  So sue me.  But recently someone told me to be careful about what I'm jealous of.  That advice could very well be the best advice I've ever been given.  There are so many things that look incredibly appealing from the outside, but those same things often look completely different once you get a little closer.  Take that last bullet point, for example - the rose gold Michael Kors watch.  It looks fabulous, and I'm sure it feels fabulous to wear it.  But upon close inspection (and obviously, considering the price), it's not even gold.  It's stainless steel.

It seems natural to want something more than what we've been given.  But it takes an awful lot of energy to focus on wanting what we don't have. 

Want to know a secret?

Someone is jealous of what you've got.  Yes, you.  They're jealous of you.  They want what you have.  Do you wish you were taller?  There's someone who wishes they could wear high heels without looking like a Behemoth.  Do you wish you hadn't gotten pregnant?  There's someone out there who spends 24 hours a day praying they could have a baby.  Do you wish you were thinner?  Someone out there wants to be as thin as you.  Do you wish you were married?  I guarantee there's someone who would kill to be as independent as you.  Do you wish you weren't married?  There's someone out there who wants a husband more than anything.  Jealousy is a vicious little feeling, and everyone has it.  It knows no boundaries, it masks the ugly truth behind a beautiful facade, and it can completely warp your perspective.

I think about this when I sit at home alone with Sol.  Yeah, I find myself wishing I were sitting in an actual house, planning a cruise of the Greek Isles on my Macbook and looking at my Michael Kors watch as I wait impatiently for my husband to show up in our Escalade with some Taco Bell for dinner (oh, sorry, were you not expecting that much detail??).  But alas, wishing will never make something happen.  Jealousy is empty energy.  Simply eyeing something with envy won't make it come true. 

Take the same advice that was given to me: be careful how much time you spend being jealous, and certainly be careful what you're jealous of.  Chances are, someone is spending their own energy wishing they had what you have.  You have a fabulous life, and an enviable life at that.  Live it well, and live it richly.  Your life is the one thing that is totally, completely, undeniably yours.

P.S. On a [sort of] related side note, I bought a watch that's reminiscent of the original Michael Kors watch - for about 1/8 of the MK price.  Not too shabby!!


  1. Awesome melanie and so damn true!!!!! i love how you view the world :)Teresa

  2. Melanie, I know where your coming from because I was there about 25 years ago. A single mom with 2 young children. They were my whole world. I envied any one who had a happy marriage, doing ok fiancialy and going on family vacations. Then one day I looked up my Confirmation verse and it hit me square in the face. Matt 6:33 Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and all his righteousness and all these things will be given unto you. I started a bible study at my new church and read the bible daily and looked at everything in a different way and many of those things I did receive or they didn't matter to me any more. I had found something more wonderful and my children will always be my #1 thing on earth that I have.

  3. Is that man who goes on a walk with his wife and child British, by any chance? :)

    1. As a matter of fact, Leah, YES he is!