Sunday, February 26

DO I MISS IT? MAYBE.

News flash: mommyhood is NOT easy. But it's definitely not as difficult as I was expecting.  I'm officially a mom now. I'm not pregnant anymore. My daughter is now 3 weeks old and she's the greatest thing that's ever happened to me (as cliche as that sounds). Yep, even at 2am I adore her. Near the end of my pregnancy, I was really worried that I would miss being pregnant and have a difficult time with the transition to mommyhood.  But as it turns out, I'm loving being a mom. 

Don't get me wrong, there are things I miss about being pregnant:
  • Now that I'm no longer sporting the baby bump, I can't park in the bright pink "expectant mother" parking spots anymore (well, I could, but last time I parked there when I wasn't pregnant, I ended up with a positive pregnancy test shortly after. Karma, anyone?).  
  •  I miss getting more than 3 hours of sleep at a time.  My girl likes to party all the time (at night, anyway).  Yes, Sol sleeps - but during the day.  She certainly keeps me on my toes at 3, 4, and 5 in the morning.  
  • I actually miss the crazy dreams.  Mine are pretty boring now - no magic cilantro paste that can save me from the dinosaur-sized horses at my cousin's outdoor wedding (yes, that was a real dream).
  • I miss going to a public event and sitting wherever I please.  Now, I sit near the back or near an exit and spend 95% of the event scanning the room, "scoping out logistics."
  • I miss using my purse.  It's only been 3 weeks and I've given up on the purse thing.  Now, my purse is the diaper bag. I'm a mom.
  • I miss "I'm just gonna run in really quick."  There's no such thing as that anymore.
  • I miss being able to prepare food when I'm hungry.  I miss having time to sit down and eat something.  Today, for example, I ate breakfast at 1:49pm - after waking up, bathing Sol, dressing Sol, feeding Sol, getting dressed, going to a new member class at church, attending the church service that followed, coming home, feeding Sol (again), bathing her (again), and dressing her (again).  And that "breakfast?"  It consisted of a tossed salad, straight out of the package.  Yum.
  • I miss Baby B dancing around in my belly.  I miss lying in bed, feeling Baby B kicking, and wondering whether it was a boy or a girl, or what he/she would look like.
  • I miss the anticipation of D-day.
But as much as I miss being pregnant, I'm really enjoying the new chapter that I've begun.
  • First and foremost, I love waking up to a little bundle named Solaya.  While I miss the anticipation of meeting my baby for the first time, I love knowing her.  I love knowing this little person who depends totally and completely on me.
  • I love having an appetite.  Near the end of my pregnancy, I remember telling my mom that I couldn't remember the last time I actually felt hungry.  I was either sick, stricken with heartburn, or just plain full.  Now I'm hungry all the time.  And given my affinity for eating a tremendous amount of food, I couldn't be happier. 
  • I love taking Sol out in public and having people "ooh" and "aah" over her.  Yeah, she's wonderful :)
  • I love the fact that I can fit my feet into my shoes again.  I almost can't believe just how swollen my legs and feet became.  FACT: I couldn't even fit my feet into my winter boots at 9 months pregnant.  Below is photo evidence of aforementioned swelling:
  • 9 months pregnant
    2 weeks into mommyhood
  • Above all, I love looking back on my pregnancy and realizing just how wrong I was. I was wrong with every bout of sobbing, every time I felt alone, every time I thought I couldn't handle this. I had no idea how much support I would have, or just how much my friends and family would love Sol. I think about the man who told me that no one would love my child because no one would be happy that I was pregnant. I think about how wrong he was. I feel sorry for him. Every time I look at my daughter, I think of how much he's missing. I get to enjoy this beautiful girl all day, every day.  Nothing can top that.  She's my whole world.

3 comments:

  1. Bravo Melanie! I'm glad I checked this out and I expected no less than something this great from you. As a mother, I truly appreciate and agree with everything you've just said and pray to have the motivation and strength you do when I'm tested in life. <3 Steph

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